Russ of Mascots-R-Us Fame

Our new mascot, Russ, came to us after his thriving family business was devasted by bubonic plague, excess drosophilia, TRU lawyers and other blights. As our mascot, Russ receives room and board, a cut of the TV revenues (if we ever get any), and a slot as Chief Testing Engineer.

Neither Russ nor us are quite sure what type of animal he is, except that, in his words, ``I am no more a giraffe than certain TRU corporate staff are sentient beings''.

Russ's natural coloring makes him a natural. Note the generic, all-purpose tread pattern (soon to be sued by several major tire companies, including ``Tahrs-R-Us'' of Sylvester, GA) markings.

However, during mating season, Russ's colors change to blend in with woodland scenery, except for his `attractor'' feathers, which turn bright red. Unfortunately, Russ only thrives in desert, tundra, modern subdivisions, and other areas where there are few trees and bushes.

Nevertheless, Russ looks forwards to a long association with RRU. If it doesn't get wiped out by some of the plagues that took Russ' family. If you get our drift.

Based on an idea by Steve Gibbs.

Last updated: 25 October 2001
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Copyright 1995-2008 Roadkills-R-Us, Austin, TX. All rights preserved, jellied, or jammed. All giraffe images based on an image courtesy of Philip Greenspun. Gratefully used with permission. Roadkills-R-Us and RRU are trademarks of Miles O'Neal <>. Web space provided by Net Ads.